I WANT TO BE A ZOMBIE…

I don’t understand what’s wrong with me lately. Alva is saying that I might be expecting too much from myself and from other people. Maybe she’s right.

I think I’ve lost myself again but I just can”t seem to figure out how it happened. But i can sense that I am not myself anymore. I don’t even know who I am right now.

Sometimes I would just want to stay trapped inside my world, apathetic and cold to the outside world. Yet, somehow, there’s always something or someone who dares to permeate through my walls. Sometimes, it scares me when my walls start to shake. I cringe at the thoughts of my walls breaking down, crumbling into minute pieces.

i want to be a zombie. Or, a great and strong vampire like Queen Maharet. Vamipre sucks the life out of everyone.  I would rather suck the life out of other people than let others suck the life out of me. There’s so little left of me right now, why risk?

It’s not the fear of rejection but the fear of being lied to.  This is another crazy post but who cares?

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P.S. I can’t wait for Lemski’s wedding. I’m not really fond of weddings but this is one wedding that I am excited about. I wish you all the best, Lemski. and I love you!

~ by 32flavors on May 24, 2008.